Pointless Conversations

Pointless Conversations: Riker vs Gaston

It's time to nail your colours to the mast (or tie them? ...latch them on? ...whatever) as two juggernauts of masculinity go head to head in a battle to find the ultimate male role model. Who's your choice: Star Trek's Commander Riker; bearded, sexually unstoppable seducer of gods, or Disney's Beauty and the Beast's Gaston, with his square jaw and catchy theme song? A tough dilemma, so read the in-depth discussion, including:

• Herculean muscle-pumps!


• David and the Goliath...the truth is told!


• Witty one liners from biblical characters.


• How does a genie have sex?

Pointless Conversations: Armageddon

Time for Armageddon! ...the film with Bruce Willis, not the cataclysmic event... anyway, on the docket are:

• Why a dirty bum is a small price to pay for financial security.


• If the Flake is a chocolate bar for women, what's the male equivalent?


• Why does confectionery go out of date on a Saturday?


• Drilling a hole and dropping some nukes? Really?

Pointless Conversations: Killing Buzz and Woody

Here’s a packed conversation with more subjects, topics, boar-munching and off-kilter ramblings than could be possible listed ...although I'm about to do that right now...

• If you chopped off his head and then threw him is a blender, would Toy Story's Woody, die?


• Forget Captain American, here's Captain Jesus!


• Who wins: Jesus or Chuck Norris?


• Talk of X-Men, then a final Asterix-style banquet, complete with boar!

This book contains plenty of (allegedly) mature and (definitely) offensive content, so please do not purchase a copy if you are offended by… ummm… anything, to be fair.