Someone Other Than a Mother

Theologian Erin S. Lane overturns dominant narratives about motherhood and inspires women to write their own stories.


Cultural scripts about motherhood are so deeply ingrained that we've come to accept them as universal truth, putting moms on an impossible pedestal and shaming childless women and nontraditional families for not measuring up. We've all heard these lines before:

• "Parenting is the toughest job in the world." This idea undermines the work of non-moms and puts pressure on moms (because the burden still falls disproportionately to women) to make parenting their full-time gig.
• "It'll be different when you have your own." Not only does this idea diminish the love of non-biological parents, but it pushes parents to go it alone, when in fact children are a gift best shared.
• "Family is the greatest legacy." For many, children are the ultimate sign of a life well lived, and successes in other areas are discounted, but this book explores how women are making meaning beyond mothering and leaving a legacy predicated on more than DNA.

Interweaving Lane's story with those of others who also chose to go off-script-including singles and couples, stepparents and foster parents, the infertile and the ambivalent-Someone Other Than a Mother creates a vision for a woman's life that affirms the beauty of motherhood while decoupling female purpose from procreation.