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Who do we love? Who loves us? And why? Is love really a mystery, or can neuroscience offer some answers to these age-old questions? In her third enthralling book about the brain, Judith Horstman takes us on a lively tour of our most important sex and love organ and the whole smorgasbord of our many kinds of love-from the bonding of parent and child to the passion of erotic love, the affectionate love of companionship, the role of animals in our lives, and the love of God.Drawing on the latest neuroscience, she explores why and how we are born to love-how we're hardwired to crave the companionship of others, and how very badly things can go without love. Among the findings: parental love makes our brain bigger, sex and orgasm make it healthier, social isolation makes it miserable-and although the craving for romantic love can be described as an addiction, friendship may actually be the most important loving relationship of your life.Based on recent studies and articles culled from the prestigious Scientific American and Scientific American Mind magazines, The Scientific American Book of Love, Sex, and the Brain offers a fascinating look at how the brain controls our loving relationships, most intimate moments, and our deep and basic need for connection.
Judith Horstman is the author of The Scientific American Day in the Life of Your Brain and The Scientific American Brave New Brain, copublished with Scientific American. She's an award-winning science journalist whose work has been widely published and is the author of four other books.
Acknowledgments xiPreface: Who Do You Love? xiiiIntroduction: What Is This Thing Called Love? 1So What Is Love? 2Love Is a Many Splendored Thing—and the Greeks Had a Word for All of the Types 4The Basics of Your Brain in Love and Sex 6I’ve Got You Under My Skull: Love in Your Brain 7You Make Me Feel So Good: The Pleasure Center 8The Very Thought of You 9How Scientists Research Love and Sex in Your Brain 101 Born to Love: Why People Need People 15Do You See What I See? How Mirror Neurons Connect Us 17The Dangers of Involuntary Mind Merging 22The Chemistry of Love 23Love Is Everywhere: Where Love Grows in the Brain 26A Brain Unable to Love: Inside the Brain of a Psychopath 27Baby Face, You’ve Got the Cutest Little Baby Face 332 Learning to Love 35How Your Parents Affect Your Love Life 36Love at First Sight: The Earliest Lessons in Love 39If You Could Read My Mind: Moms Do 42A Mother’s Everlasting Love 43How Parenting Primes Your Brain for Love 45Parenting Rewires the Daddy Brain as Well 46How Father Love Feeds Both Brains 47Postpartum Depression: Misery for Mom and Baby 50Loving the One Who Hurts You: Why Children Cling to Abusers 51What If Things Went Wrong with That First Love? 52In the End: Do Parents Matter? 543 His Brain, Her Brain, Gay Brain, and Other Brains 57How Real Are the Differences? 58The Five Genders of the Brain 60His Brain, Her Brain: The Geography 61So What Does This Have to Do with Love? 63Our Changeable Brains 66Some Myths About Male and Female Brains: True or False? 68Toujours Gay: The Gay Brain Is Born That Way 72Can Animals Be Gay? Better to Call It Bisexual 74I Am What I Am 76The Third Gender: When Gender and Sex Do Not Align 79Are There Asexuals Among Us? On the Possibility of a Fourth Sexual Orientation 814 That Old Black Magic: Your Brain in Love 85How Love and Sex Are Good for Your Brain 88When Love Occupies Your Brain 90Who Do You Love? And Who Loves Ya, Baby? 91You’ve Got That Lovin’ Feelin’, But What Turns You On? 96You Go to My Nose: The Power of Smell over Sex 96A Kiss Is (More Than) Just a Kiss 102You Light Up My Brain 104What’s Love Got to Do with It? Plenty It Turns Out—for Women 108Need Some Love Potion? Try a Bit of Oxytocin Spray 109I’ll Have What She’s Having: What Makes a Better Female Orgasm? 110Does the Penis Have a Brain of Its Own? 112When Things Go Wrong: A Fine Romance 1155 Friendship, Such a Perfect Blendship: Or, with a Little Help from My Friends 121Is Friendship Declining? 123Are You Lonesome Tonight? 60 Million Other Americans Are 125You’ve Got a Friend—or You Should! 126Widening the Social Circle 129Imaginary Friends: TV Characters Can Ease Your Pain 130Until the Real Thing Comes Along: Your Brain on Facebook 133Work, the “Other Love” in Your Life 135Can Animals Love? Yes, and More 136How to Make Friends 1396 Only You Can Make My Dreams Come True: Let’s Get Married 143Grow Old Along with Me: The Marriage Benefits 144You Make Me Feel So Good: Romance Lowers Stress 145Finding That Special Someone: Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places? 146Falling and Staying in Love 148I’ve Grown Accustomed to Your Face 150My One and Only Love: Are We Monogamous? 151Granny’s Got to Have It 153Your Hormones May Drive You Apart: A Tough Pill to Swallow 155Making Love Last: I Get a Kick out of You 156Can Pornography Help Your Love Life? 158Love Will Keep Us Together: Lasting Romance Is Embossed in the Brain 159Will You Still Need Me When I’m 64? 1617 You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin’: When Love Dies 165Breaking Up Is Hard to Do: How Rejection Affects Your Brain 166The Jilted Brain 167After the Love Is Gone—You Ache and Ache 169Can’t Live If Living Is Without You: The Widowhood Effect 171Achy Breaky Heart: Can You Die of a Broken Heart? 172Ain’t No Cure for Love—But Acetaminophen Could Help 172Every Time You Say Good-Bye, I Die a Little: Why It Hurts to Leave Your Lover 174Broken Promises: Can the Brain Predict Betrayal? 176Coping with a Breaking Heart 1788 For the Love of God 181Searching for God in Your Brain 182Epilepsy, the Temporal Lobe, and God 182Strokes of Insight: Brain Changes and Spiritual Awakening 184Religious Ecstasy Is Like Romantic Love—in the Brain at Least 186God on the Brain: What Brain Scans Show 188Could Religion Shrink Your Brain? 190The Evolutionary Roots of God Thought 191God Neurons May Be Everywhere 1929 Technology, Science, and the Future of Sex 195The Wonderful World of Cybersex 196Sex in Bits and Bytes: The Future of Virtual Sex Is Here 19910 How Can Love Survive? 201But What of Love? 204Glossary 207Sources 215Illustration Credits 229About the Author 231Index 233
"This basic introduction to the neuroscience of love and sex is a good starting place for readers new to the subject...one hopes it will whet readers' appetites for more nuanced explorations of this area of research." (Library Journal, April 2012)
